Friday, July 24, 2009

First Make-Out Off A Cold Approach

So I went visiting my buddy MC in a town 45 minutes away last night. We went bar hopping.

First Bar: No easily available sets, met one girl at the bar, she was getting drinks for her friends (huge mixed set). I struck up a conversation, got her laughing with some good-humored teases about how all those drinks are hers and she's the biggest drunk. When she paid for the drinks, she went back to her friends - botched set.

Analysis: No real attraction, her laugh was courteously conditioned when a guy says something semi-funny.

2nd Bar, girl 1: I sat at a bar next to a 3-set and struck up a conversation with the girl closest to me. Soon after, MC engaged another one. We chatted for about 5-10 minutes, got her laughing, transitioned smoothly into the handwriting analysis test. She was amazed, and I asked:
Me: From a scale of 1 to 10, how close was I?
Her: Pretty damn close
Me: In that case, I would like you to write down your number under the signature
Her: No.......no...........I don't give out my number to strangers, that's how you get into trouble
Me: That's true, but I'm not a stranger, I know all about your deepest inner thoughts.


Her friend (the one that MC isn't engaging) went up to her and said "I'm going to the bathroom, would you like to come?" She told me "She'll be right back", I know what that usually means, I smiled at her, "Have a good night". She said "No, I'll be back", I kept smiling, "yeah, okay". Soon after, MC lost his girl to the couple going to the bathroom too. Later on, MC told me they were drinking in a different area of the bar.

Analysis:
  • There could be many reasons why she didn't give me her number, but she might've been taken.
  • I'm assuming when I persuaded her for her number, she gave her friend a hint to drag her away, but I didn't catch that hint.
  • Why did she go the extra mile to try to convince me she'll be back? Do women get the extra joy of having a guy genuinely believe one of her lies?

2nd Bar Girl 2: 2 minutes after girl1 left, another girl went up to the bar to settle her tab. I used a situational opener and we got into a conversation. She's going to a small food/bar with her friends. It was a 5 minute quick number close on a piece of napkin, then I asked her to write her signature down under it and started the handwriting analysis routine. But right after I started, I paused and said "Hmmmmm......if I do this for you, what would you do for me?" She giggled a little, and I said "How about this, make an animals noise, any animals. Make it convincing". She said she did a great goat impression, and did it, I made fun of her a little for it, and finished the handwriting analysis routine. After I told her that she had a high sex drive, but isn't very creative sexually, as in she wants it in the same position over and over, she disagreed with it. I cockily said "Well, you signature disagrees". MC tapped me on the shoulder and asked me how long it'll be, it perfectly gave me an out before the conversation got boring. I told her "Sorry, I need to get going". She said "You got my number, right?" I told her "Yeah, I'll give you a call sometime". It ended with a hug and me leaving.

About 45 minutes later, I wanted to solidify the number and sent her a text message:
"Having some good food? PS, great goat impression"

No reply. I will try giving her a call Saturday or Sunday afternoon, she could just not be into texting.

Analysis: Did everything correctly - situation opener, got her laughing, went for a quick number, ran handwriting analysis routine after number close to build comfort, left when my friend wanted to leave instead of having her leave first, don't know what I did wrong.

Bar 3: MC and I sat at the bar. I sat on the left seat while MC is on the right. MC opened a set on his right, while during a break from that set, he saw a girl behind me getting to the bar (probably buying drinks). He said "Are you trying to hit on my friend here? Hovering over him like that?" I kept on staring at the TV and not paying attention, it was his set and I didn't want to inject. MC then brought it to my attention and gave that set to me.
The girl said: "Hi"
Me: If you're gonna hit on me, it has to be better than that, you know, like "do you come her often" or "what's your sign" or something other than "hi".
She laughs: So, do you come here often?
Me: Much better, are you gonna buy me a drink too?

She laughs some more, I kept on the cocky and funny tease. She bought a couple of drinks, and I teased her about being the biggest drunk and those are all her drinks. She said "No, I'm getting some rounds for my friends, but I'll take this shot here". We cheered, she took her shot, I sipped on my drink slowly. She was very receptive and gave some strong IOI's, and said "You're welcome to join my friends out there" (on the patio of the bar). I scooted back from my stool, leaving a corner of the stool unused between my legs, and said "Or you can sit down here with me". She gave a cute smiley sigh and said "Okay". She sat on the same stool as me, between my legs. I held her around the waist and touched her up and down, across the breasts but never rested my hand on it. She seemed to enjoy it and touched up my leg but stopped short before my crotch. It turned out that she's from a city 6 hrs away, and just here a couple of times per year, and is driving back the next day. She's hanging with her friends and I live 45 minutes away, fucking logistics.

I had her write her number and Email on a napkin while she's in my arms. After a while, she was about to get up and leave, and I told her "I bet you suck at thumb wrestling". She held out her hand and said "Bring it". I acted surprised, laughing, "Are you serious? Are we really gonna do this?" And we started thumb wrestling. I started this game because I wanted to try to transition into the following game:

Play a stupid game invented by Johnny Wolf called "I'm going to guess your bra size while touching your tits". The trick is I always guess one size smaller than she actually is, making her say "nooo, I'm a D cup!" That's when you say "I don't believe." And touch her breasts saying, okay maybe you are. (don't try this unless you're properly socially and sexually calibrated)

I didn't transition into that game, but it transitioned into something else instead - We thumb wrestling ended up with us moving our arms up and down in the air for 30 seconds, and I somehow got both her thumbs in my right hand. She is trying to slip it away as
I said: Awww......you seem to be stuck.
She: Hey, that's not fair.
Me: Tell ya what, give me a kiss, make it convincing and I'll let you go.
She was hesitating. She almost slipped both thumbs away and I knew I couldn't keep holding on, so I let her go
Me:Here, I let you go, you should give me a kiss to thank me instead.


She was just looking at me instead, so I leaned in for the kiss. I ran my hand across her face and body as we were making out with tongue, and it lasted about 15 seconds. She said "How's this for convincing" as she was getting up to join her friends. I smiled, and said "I'll shoot you an Email", and the next time I'm in that area or you're back here, let's get together. She said "Sure" and that ended it.

Analysis: Nothing probably will come out of this. She's on "vacation mode" and "this doesn't count mode" because she's going back to her home-city the next day. But maybe I'll be able to keep in touch. I go back to a city neighboring hers 2-3 times a year, and she comes here just as often, just maybe.

My very first make-out close off a cold approach (even though it was a warm set opened by MC)

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Attraction Switches For Women - Part 1

We all know about the basic attraction switches - funny, intelligent, in good shape, etc. Different PUA's have different lists, thought I'd share a couple of lists. Part one is from Mr M of LSI.
Buying Temperature
a. Definition: Her emotional state is increased by being around you.
b. Done by: Teasing, humor, role plays, "cocky-funny," misinterpretation, games, physical escalation (aka "kino") and dominance, etc.
c. Emphasis on: Humor (particularly push/pull), pre-selection, and dominance.
d. Summary: You don't have to talk about yourself at all - the focus is on fun.
e. Drawbacks: Transferrable, can be easily lost if not accompanied by framing, you can become the dancing monkey.

Intrigue
a. Definition: She is intrigued by talking to you - you have an uncanny understanding of her and other people around her.
b. Done by: Cold reading, Interactive Value Demonstrations, storytelling.
c. Emphasis on: Social Intelligence and showing understanding of her world.
d. Summary: You talk about her, others and your unique experiences. The focus is on intriguing her.
e. Drawbacks: Can feel contrived the more it relies on cold reads, palm readings, etc. Not appropriate or practical in some high-energy situations.

High Value and Sexual Frames
a. Definition: She wants to get to know you and be around you because you are high-value in her eyes. You are a guy whom she could potentially sleep with and even have a relationship with.
b. Done by: Framing, social proof, storytelling, disqualification, leading, sexual hoops, innuendo.
c. Emphasis on: Health and Appearance, Wealth, Pre-Selection, Challenging, Confidence.
d. Summary: You talk about yourself.

'Warm and Fuzzy' Attraction
a. Definition: She sees you as an authentic and real person with integrity and a well-rounded personality.
b. Done by: Storytelling about family, friends, your childhood and vulnerabilities.
c. Emphasis on: Protector of loved ones, willingness to emote, moving life stories.
d. Summary: You talk about yourself, your family and your experiences.
e. Drawbacks: Too much of this and you get boring or one-dimensional.

Vibing
a. Definition: She feels that you are on the same wavelength as her. This actually amplifies existing attraction.
b. Done by: Normalization of conversation, finding topics of common interest, starting to talk more deeply about those topics and finding qualities about her that interest you.
c. Emphasis on: Social intuition, genuinely connecting, qualification.
d. Summary: You and her exchange thoughts about your commonalities and you validate her about qualities that she possesses that are important to you (there is overlap here with the Qualification and Comfort stages of the Love Systems Triad).
e. Drawbacks: If you do too much of this without raising buying temperature, intrigue, etc., you fall into the "let's just be friends" zone, unless she is already attracted to you based on your looks.