Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Tuesday night date

MM and I were supposed to go out for drinks Tuesday night, and I invited the Wed night girl along, and told her to bring friends. This way, MM and I can practice splitting the set. She called me back Monday night saying she's up for drinks, but she doesn't know if she can find someone to bring. Being the ass that I am, I gave her some small pressure to bring some friends anyway.

MM wasn't feeling well, so I left the girl a message saying he wasn't feeling well and isn't coming out, but I was still going to go out and have a drink or two because I was working late that day and will need a drink afterwards (total white lie). She's still welcome to join me if she'd like. We set up a time and place, and we met up.

The "frame" of two people getting together for drinks might be the downfall of the night, I never saw a good opportunity to make a move throughout the night.

With the social proof of the girl, I felt the "vibe" again.......super social, talking to anyone around me, etc. We started out playing a few games of pool, busted her balls a little on how much she sucked at it, did some Cocky & Funny stuff, etc. There was another couple about 10 feet away sitting on a table and we were somewhat friendly to them, especially with the vibe I have. At the end of the pool games, I asked my date "What do you think, first date or second?". She guesses second, and I said "I'm thinking first, just because of their awkwardness towards each other, and they were asking questions like 'what do you do', and stuff". As we were leaving the pool tables, I just looked at the couple with a smile, and asked "First date or second?" They said first. I smiled and said "Thanks". As I was turning away, they stopped me and ask "How'd you guess?" I told them that you guys seemed slightly nervous with your body language, and asking intro questions like "what do you do". He then asked me "What about you two?" I smiled and say "We just met". As I was walking away, I turned around and said"You guys DO make a lovely couple though". Hopefully that helped me build some dating karma, as I would like some stranger saying that to myself and my date if I was on the first date.

We left the pool table area and went to the bar for one more drink, so far we've had one each at the pool table. I tried to stay away from "get to know you" questions and tried my best to go with random threads, such as "Did anything fun today?" type. She did ask me what I do for a living. I remember last Wed night, I've told the table I was a marketing manager and joked a little about "me making all you guys spend your money" and stuff. I decided this time I'm going to answer the question with "I'm a lettuce washer for Taco Bell". She laughed, didn't really pursue it more. Throughout the night, we made jokes about it, she asked me if I get paid by the lettuce washed per pound, I said "no, per leaf", etc. But she knew I worked in an office because of the stories I tell, but it always goes back to Taco bell, "Yeah, Email and E-calendar's are such great tools, I'm so glad I got that at Taco Bell".

We drove down the street into an apartment basketball court for some "drunk basketball". I tried to do some kino stuff by "pinch on the stomach" defense and such, never really escalated intimacy. The guy working for the apartment kicked us out because we weren't supposed to be playing after 10PM talking about people trying to sleep and such. I kept the mood light on the drive back and kept joking around with her. I made sure she put on her seat belt, then she jokingly said she wouldn't wanna die in my car, I told her before she does, I should buy some life insurance on her, she said I wouldn't get anything and strangers can't just buy life insurance on one another, I told her but we're not strangers, we went out for drinks, etc. I told her in a jokingly way "Yeah, I'm not a big fan of you dying. I'm not super opposed to it, but it would totally ruin my hour", etc.

We then took a walk by a fountain with benches, we sat down on the benches and chatted a little more. We talked about some random psychology stuff, and she said in a psyc test, she subconsciously chose companionship over protection, mobility, and life needs. I then basically (in a really obvious way) put one arm around her, and jokingly said "that's awesome, I'm the perfect companion then. I won't protect you or take you places. Chances are, I'll probably leech off you too, but I'm here for your companionship". She's joked "You'd just cheer me on if I was to get mugged"? I joked "Nope, probably not that either, but I'll be right here watching you getting mugged and sit here with ya. Then I'd tell the mugger don't take her too far, cuz I'm supposed to be her companion and then I'd have to go find her". She still didn't show any IOI's, she didn't lean in when I put my arm around her, just sat up as normal etc, so after the companionship thread is over, I took my arm off and kept on joking around with her on different subjects.

Around 11:57, I decided to end the date before joking vibe dies down and things fizzle out, and I walked her to her car, traded a semi-business like half hug to end it. I told her I'll be out of town this weekend, but will call or text her next week or next weekend.


Things I did well:
  • Vibe - kept up the sociable, high energy, upbeat, funny vibe for my date and everyone I came to contact with, she was laughing and having fun the whole time
  • Didn't acted like a needy guy, talked to her like how I would with most of my friends
  • Ended the date on a fairly high note, instead of letting things die down then having her say "I need to go"
  • Didn't go into "get to know you" subjects to start with, began the conversation acting like I already knew her, asking her questions like "What's going on" and "How was your day" instead of "what do you do", but most of the "boring" subjects came out as sprinkles throughout the night so I got to know her lifestyle anyway.
  • Created the subconscious "you and I against the world" mentality - in both the guessing other couple's first or second date, and getting kicked off the basketball court.
Things I fucked up on:
  • Couldn't build much "attraction" throughout the date - don't know the formula. I'm guessing I need to rehearse some DHV stories/routines and throw in some false disqualifiers
  • Failed a "shit test" - well, probably more than one but this one I knew I failed. She says she's gonna practice and will kick my ass in pool, and I did the C&F and "Sure, I can wait 3-5 years". She then said "Okay, so I'm not gonna see you in 5 years, then come back and challenge you in pool". I said "Well, hopefully we'll still be doing drinks in between that". About 30 seconds later while she was talking about something else, I mentally said "Oh fuck, that was a shit test and I fucked it up".

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